Here are some words or terms (or emojis!) 😜 you might come across while chatting with guys online and on apps.
In different places or on different apps, these words may have different meanings than the ones provided here, but here are some typical definitions of some of the words you might see.
🔊 Remember, not all of these terms are nice, and they can actually be quite hurtful and harmful, so make sure you think about the meaning and impact they have before you use any of them. 🔊
Marijuana, also known as pot or weed.
These are ways of signaling HIV status. [+] means HIV-positive. [-] means HIV-negative as of their last HIV test. [=] means that the user doesn’t discriminate based on HIV status. Remember that people’s statuses can sometimes change, but that if you are using protection like PrEP, condoms, or undetectable viral load, folks with different HIV statuses can have sex without worrying about transmitting HIV.
Someone looking to give or receive money in exchange for sex. This is illegal in many places.
A way of asking someone’s age, sex and location. For example, an 18-year-old guy from Calgary would respond: 18/M/Calgary.
Sex without a condom. It can feel really good- but remember, this is a very common way guys get sexually transmitted diseases! If you are barebacking, make sure you take other health precautions, like PrEP, which can help prevent the spread of HIV but not other STIs.
A big, hairy guy.
A preferred sex role where a guy gets another guy’s dick or strap-on put inside him.
Someone who is into bigger guys and bears.
A term used to refer to guys who are HIV-negative or don’t have any STIs. This is a negative word that stigmatizes and isolates people who are living with HIV or have other sexually transmitted diseases, so you shouldn’t use it!
Circumcised penis (foreskin has been removed).
An older guy.
A term that means “drug and disease free”. This term is negative and derogatory. It shouldn’t be used because it stigmatizes and isolates people who are living with HIV or other diseases, and people who use drugs.
Private, sometimes meaning not out of the closet.
A sexual preference where one likes to be more aggressive and/or have the power.
A person with feminine characteristics or other traits associated with women and feminine people.
Fisting or fistfucking. This is a kink which involves penetration using the whole hand or fist. The safest way to do this is to use gloves and lots of lube!
Stands for “Female-to-male”. Refers to a trans guy— a guy who was born with female body parts but has transitioned physically to a guy to match their gender experience.
Often used to mean sex.
Stands for “friends with benefits.” This refers to friends who have sex, but don’t have a romantic relationship.
Someone looking to pay for sex. This is illegal in some places.
A sexual act where one person pees on another.
A casual or sexual meet up.
Someone who is able to host is able to have people over for sex.
Someone who has a big dick.
Stands for “height and weight proportionate.” This is a term that criticizes people with bodies that don’t fit society’s ideals of a normal size.
Stands for “jerking off” or “jacking off,” meaning masturbation.
A sexual preference that involves unique turn-ons, like getting tied up, peed on, or having dom/sub roles.
Guys who are into leather harnesses and clothing. A popular kink.
Interested in sex right now or today.
Stands for “long-term relationship.” Some guys put this in their profile to indicate they are looking for more than just sex.
Short for “masculine”. A person with characteristics usually associated with men, also known as macho or butch.
Stands for “Male to female”. Refers to a trans woman— a woman who was born with male body parts but has transitioned physically to a woman to match their gender experience.
HIV-negative as of their last HIV test. Remember that people’s statuses can sometimes change, but that if you are using protection like PrEP, condoms, or undetectable viral load, folks with different HIV statuses can have sex without worrying about transmitting HIV.
“No strings attached”, usually refers to sex without dating or having a relationship involved.
Some guys have boyfriends or partners, and also hook up with other guys. This is usually a decision all parties involved agree on.
A slimmer, hairy guy.
A guy who’s into kinks, has few sexual limits, and enjoys creative or unique sexual acts.
“Party and play” refers to using drugs before or during sex. These drugs are usually harder drugs, like crystal meth, MDMA and poppers. It’s important to understand that different drugs have different effects, and can change people’s ability to make decisions and set boundaries during sex. Mixing drugs with alcohol or other drugs also have different side effects. Knowing what all these are before engaging in PnP is really important. It’s best to know what you’re getting yourself into first, and to remember to stick to your regular routine of sexual health and safety.
A person living with HIV (HIV-positive).
PEP stands for “Post-Exposure Prophylaxis.” It’s a medication that people take within the first 72 hours after having sex, if they think they’ve been exposed to HIV. It can prevent an HIV infection from taking hold in the body.
Someone who has romantic relationships with more than one person at a time.
PrEP stands for “Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis.” It’s a daily pill that an HIV-negative guy can take to prevent HIV from taking hold in the body, even if he is exposed to the virus.
An identity or term used to mean that your sexuality or gender identity differs from society’s idea of what’s “normal” — this can mean being gay, trans, 2s, or simply different from straight folks.
No hair or not much hair on the body.
A sexual preference where one likes to let the other sexual partner(s) take control.
Crystal meth, also known as ice, crank, or speed. Crystal meth is illegal and highly addictive. It is bad for your physical, mental and sexual health, and becoming addicted can lead to a set of more issues and health problems. It’s important you know about the drug and its effects if you are going to try it. You can get more info here.
A preferred sex role where a guy puts their dick or strap-on inside another guy. The penetrative partner in anal sex.
Younger, skinnier guys.
“Uncut” or uncircumcised penis (foreskin intact).
Undetectable is short for an “undetectable viral load.” This is when an HIV-positive person has so little of the virus in their body that they can’t pass on HIV to other people. This is thanks to how far HIV treatment medication has come!
Not into kink, prefers plain or simple sex acts.
A guy who is into both topping and bottoming (likes putting his dick inside another guy and also likes having a dick inside him).
Sexy stuff involving pee.